Mirtth - Pip's tale

Italicised bits are from the original report of this run, written by me, since lost to the vagaries of X-no archive usenet posts.

Yet another MIRTTH run out today. The 'throng' (well, 7 of us) started at Macclesfield and headed for the A54. Great bouncy, twisty road to the Cat and Fiddle. Lots of TWA bits. 'Kin superb road that I don't know as well as I should, really. Climbs like a homesick angel, it does. With bad hiccups. Lots of glimpse-the-clear-road-ahead-through-the-trees bends to be howled through and out of. Discovered at the end that Pip's Vile Fecker had overheated. Well, it's been flushed, tested and flushed again. The compression tests fine, as does the cooling system and there is *no* thermostat. Timing and plugs are fine. I dunno. It's OK apart from when I'm wringing it's neck, and that road *has* to be attacked with much wringing. And it was a bloody hot day. Off to Long Hill to Whaley Bridge, a road freshly covered with loose chippings in the name of re-surfacing. Managed to lose Nursey at this point. Laughed at a couple on a trailie wearing just shirts and shorts - those loose chippings must have hurt. Surface dressing - why do they fucking bother? 2mm of tar and 300mm of gravel. Sticks to yer tyres and flings off backwards and forwards - I saw chippings going forwards, bouncing off the road and coming back up to zing off the fairing. While trundling at 20mph in a crocodile headed by some unfortunate wobbling a new BMW down the hill. Pip poured some more water into the VF. Yerrss. The kettle was boiling well by that point - I'll take teabags next time. It used/boiled off/spat out some 6 litres of water, all told. Ice creams at the layby at the end while waiting for ppl to catch up. Pip provided entertainment by locking the front wheel on gravel while trying to stop in time and almost dropping the Vile Fecker. Oh how we giggled. :-) Bastards, the lot of yez. I'll bet you carry that fine gravel in your leathers and scatter it in inappropriate places to catch out poor innocents like meself. Next time flook gets drunk, I'll be there with a pocketful of diced carrots ... Pip failed to pour water into the VF. It was indicating verybloodyhot but had not lost any water. Mysterious, until you take into account the lake across the road which could have donated a refill to the water flask. Vile but not stupid, that Honda. Edale came next. Very "3 dimensional" according to Pip. Lotsa fun though. Understatement. Up, down, round - repeat - repeat ... throw in a few narrow bridges and the odd hairpin or two. Sprinkle with several sudden humps and drops. Add one straight - just one. In about 10 miles, just to show the Romans they could do straights, but didn't want to be arsed. Well, it's not as if the Romans ever did anything for us, is it? Then there was the ancient woman in a car that she was straining to see over the steering wheel of, crawling down a very narrowing road to a 90 degree right/single width bridge/90 degree left. I realised she was not all there, so blipped it a good 'un and popped out and past before she could have me off. Just as well, as she then stopped on the bridge having met a car that I'd just dodged. She ignored the two bikes behind her and reversed smack into the front wheel of the R1. Much kevlar knuckle/boot lid interface ensued, but she kept going, screaming at him to get out of her way -couldn't he see she was reversing? Nutter. Macc. via Whaley Bridge which was fun. By this time Pip was cruising in 5th and using 4th to slow down so he wouldn't heat the engine too much. The Fecker was approaching meltdown and it occurred that the RAC were probably very busy that evening. I went into get-me-home mode. Really bloody missed the engine braking - cooked the brake pads trying to carry maximum corner speed in 4th so as to continue to make reasonable progress, once acceleration had become a luxury. Found a nutter who decided to talk to us about olde worlde bike racers and stuff. I ignored him. We all tried to ignore him, but by Ged he was persistent. Kept on about racers he had known and how Hailwood's knees used to bleed as he pioneered kneedown cornering ... The undead seem to manage ignoring and shrugging rather better than the rest of us. (That's flook, btw - he of the wooden-soled boots, unhealthy pallor and (im)mortal fear of direct sunlight and hairdressers). Pip poured some water into the VF. Goes without bloody saying really, dunnit? People went home. Pip and I went along the Cat and Fiddle at a sedate pace (too many bloody cars and slow things in the way) before the A54 back to Congleton. A couple of incredibly slow bikes (dunno what) got in the way untilI passed one around the outside of a hairpin. Don't think he knew we were there. The undead see no fear of bends at all. One rotting cheek flops off the seat, a knee apparently suspended only by a tendon, hinges lazily out toward the tarmac and the bike whistles around the outside of a numpty - pursued by a streamer of hair from beneath the helmet and a dark line from beneath the rear tyre ... Pip blasted past a GSXR600 on a straight bit of the A54! Heh. Stuffed him a good one coming off a bend. He was quick up the straights but over-fond of his brakes into bends so I had to pull the old slingshot out technique. Shocked him, I hope. Left him in a cloud of steam and rust, we did. {FX: drumroll} Laydees and gennelmen, it gives me great amusement to announce a new MIRTTH number recipient :- #15 Pip VF750 Fuck. That was hard work, that was. I'm pleased to have provided amusement. I learned a lot, met some real nice folks, rode some stunning roads and had a bloody good laugh. Next time with feeling and a functioning cooling system, I think. Cheers flook - I'd invite you to a roundabout for this but you'd shrug it off. Sorry to bore the rest of you to bits ... Special thanks are due to Bear, Veggie and YTC#1 whose sound advice was running through my head along all those nadgery roads with the tightening bastard bends and ripply surfaces. Lean it more, they all say. Countersteer like a twat, keep the power on and get off the bloody brakes when it goes pear-shaped. It works. Really.